I restored this study journal today, and seeing my old posts felt like opening a small time capsule.
The last time I was actively writing here, I was still trying to continue my University of London BSc Computer Science journey. I had already started through the Performance-Based Admission route, completed Introduction to Programming I, and then came face to face with the module that eventually became my wall: Discrete Mathematics.
I withdrew from Discrete Mathematics mid-term.
At the time, it felt like a pause. I thought I would just step back, recover, and return when things became manageable again. But life had other plans.
Over the past two years, my health became the priority. I went through a difficult season that included Graves’ disease, hyperthyroidism, gallbladder issues, surgery, pneumonia, blood pressure concerns, and the kind of chronic stress that slowly forces you to remove everything that is not essential. Studies became one of the responsibilities I had to let go of.
It was not an easy decision. I love learning. I always have. Computer Science was not just another course I enrolled in; it was something I wanted to finish for myself, for my future, and for the version of me that still believes I can grow into something more.
But sometimes, even the things we love need to wait while we survive.
For a long time, I did not know if I would still be allowed to return. My Performance-Based Admission registration had already expired, and my request for a retrospective leave of absence was denied. That was painful to read, but it was also understandable. I knew I had failed to notify the university properly at the time. I was overwhelmed, unwell, and simply trying to get through each season.
Still, I decided to try.
I submitted my medical records and explained what had happened over the past two years. I asked if there was any possible way for me to continue. The request was forwarded to the Programme Director, and after waiting, I finally received the news I had been hoping for:
I was granted a one-year extension.
That extension gives me one remaining chance to complete Discrete Mathematics under the Performance-Based Admission route.
So here I am again.
Not starting from the beginning, but starting again.
This time, I know better. I know Discrete Mathematics is hard. I know I cannot walk into it casually and hope I survive. I know I need preparation, structure, practice, and consistency. I also know that I am not the same person who withdrew before. I have been through a lot. I have recovered. I have rebuilt parts of my health and lifestyle. I have learned to take my limits seriously.
My goal now is simple:
Pass Discrete Mathematics. Enter the full BSc. Continue the journey.
I am preparing early with math refreshers, MIT lectures, the Rosen textbook, Coursera resources, and a dedicated study system. I am rebuilding the foundations slowly: logic, truth tables, sets, functions, proofs, induction, counting, graphs, and all the parts of Discrete Mathematics that once felt intimidating.
I do not want to romanticize this comeback. I know it will be hard. I know there will be days when I will feel slow, rusty, or scared. But I also know that hard does not mean impossible.
There was a time when I regretted not finishing college earlier. I still feel that sometimes. But I am learning to look at this differently now.
The years passed, yes. But I am still here. I still want to learn. I still want to finish what I started. I still want to build a future where I do not reach the next season of my life wondering what else I could have done.
So this is my comeback post.
A little nervous. A little hopeful. More realistic than before. More prepared than before.
And this time, I am not walking into Discrete Mathematics alone.
One step at a time.
Next goal: pass DM.
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